"Kendall!"

So I was camping last year with my wife, three children, and our neighbors/friends. Anyway, we were all inside a net/tent (whatever those are called) spending time in camping lounge chairs, in the sun but out separated from the flying bugs. One of my little ones, who was three then, was smacking the net with her hand. There was the potential of making a preexisting hole bigger than it was, so I threatened her: "Kendall," I said, "if you keep it up, I'm gonna spank you so hard you won't remember your name." So the next thing we knew, she hit the screen again. I got out of my lounge chair, went out of the screen, spanked Kendall, and immediately I heard her shout, "Kendall!"

I don't spank them anymore: it obviously does not work.